Jack and the Beantin

One-Act Pantomime

Running time: 30 minutes approximately

Available from Lazy Bees Scripts

Songs: the script includes three suggestions, including some old favourites with new lyrics.

This version almost follows the traditional story. Our hero swaps his cow for a tin of beans – and finds next morning that the tin has grown.

The script features a talking cow called Gertrude and a talking hen called Rover. The Giant is not happy with life because he is too small to be a Giant.

In the end, every character (including the cow, the hen, the beanseller, the Giant's housekeeper and the Giant) turns out to be someone else's long-lost husband/wife/twin brother or farmyard friend. Three optional songs are supplied.

Characters:

Jack Broke

Mrs Broke

Gertrude, a cow (both halves)

Beth, Jack's girlfriend

Herbert Little, a giant

Mrs Scrubba, housekeeper

Rover, a hen

A Beanseller

Script Extract:
Gertrude: (Front End) 'Ere! 'Ow about 'em saying 'ello to me?

Jack: (Surprised) Oh! (Thinks) Well, I suppose they could. Would you do

that, boys and girls?

Audience: Yes!

Jack:  It would make this poor old cow very happy! When I tell you, will you shout out, Hello Gertrude? That's her name – Gertrude. It's because she's in two halves. (He points) This half's Gert. And this half's rude.

Gertrude: (Back End) :'Ere. 'Oo are you calling rude?

Jack:  It's your name, silly. Honestly, who ever heard of a cow talking out of its rear end?